Thursday, April 15, 2010

Quit Playing Games With My Heart

I thought I should probably explain my eHarmony strategy. You see, I don't want you all to be thinking that I am leading on these poor, lonely pastors and computer programers. So here's how it works.

  • I close almost all of the matches immediately. Usually for reasons that we have discussed before.
  • I leave others open for the time being. If the match is closed, they cannot contact me. So anyone who isn't a complete weirdo I will leave open for a while, to give them a chance. That's why I have the 48 open ones now. I need to go back and sort through those though. I'm thinking that at least 40 of them have missed their chance.

For the ones that I leave open, if they send me questions, I usually answer. But, here's the point that I want to make clear:

I don't lead on any of these eHarmony guys.

As we have seen, many of these guys are.... how should I say it.... odd. So, to play with their poor little fragile hearts would be cruel and unusual punishment.

So, I only actually talk to the ones that I would actually, potentially be interested in, in real life. Now, as we have covered many times, I am not using eHarmony to desperately search for a husband. But, I have always said that I would be happy with a relationship whenever God wants to bless me with that, through whatever avenue He wants to use. So, as I am on eHarmony, I close matches or leave them open based on my real life preferences. Even if I'm not actively looking for a relationship, I refuse to lead on anyone that I wouldn't potentially be interested in.

Moral of the story: I'm not a jerk.

To quote the wise words of the Backstreet Boys:

"Oh Baby baby, the love that we had was so strong,
Don't leave me hanging here forever,
oh baby baby, this is not right, lets stop this tonight,

Quit playing games with my heart
(Quit playing games with my heart)
With my heart
(Before you tear us apart)
My heart
(Quit playing games with my heart)"

Oh Backstreet Boys. How I love you. I wonder if any of them are on eHarmony? I sure hope they didn't try to cover up their identity by listing themselves as accountants.....

4 comments:

  1. I'm surprised I haven't been matched with you on e-harmony! But you're out of my distance range. Good to get some insight into what women are thinking when they get matched with a pastor or computer programer, although I'm neither I'm in a boy band, you may have heard of us... N-Sync, I can't stand those Backtreet hacks. I like your style of closing people out. And from the male perspective, let me tell you, many of the woman are similar to the Queen song, who make the world go round.

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  2. Your strategy only works for a woman who is young. I am mid-30s and signed up for eHarmony about three weeks ago and have averaged more than one communication initiation from a woman per day. I used eHarmony back in my late 20s and it wasn't like this at all - I had to do most of the contacting back then. I suspect that most of these women contacting me now are simply desperate to find their husband before their biological clocks run out.

    It really is a shame that so many women waste their most fertile years playing the field, focusing entirely on their careers, or are simply super-picky. I know lots of women in their late 30s/early 40s who supposedly wanted to have children but ran out of time to do so for whatever reason.

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  3. love the backstreet boys quote, hah! perfectly tied it all in :)

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